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Helping my boy be more of a boy..?

I love my son. He's 7. I just get very frustrated at times. He has no interest in sports, super heroes or cars.His life is evolved around books, drawing and role playing like Pokemon or Digimon. He has interest in a few DS games but that's it. O and he's obsessed with Total Drama Island on Thursday nights. He's extremely bright and excells in his education. He's just not interested in celebrating halloween...or doing anything other kids/boys seem to like. I'm at a loss. It makes Holiday's/Gift buying impossible. He has 20 birthday presents in his room still in their boxes. No interest in TransFormer, Hulk, Spiderman or whatever else is in there. What can I do for my son. I feel like he's missing out.

Public Comments

1. So, he's more of an intellectual type. Big deal. Trust me, when he's older and applying to colleges, you'll be GLAD he spent his time studying and reading rather than playing sports.
2. You should read Bringing Up Boys by James Dobson. I wish I could cut and paste, there is a whole chapter on this stuff! Good luck!!
3. Maybe hes more of the artistic type.. More of the studying type.. Just because your a boy doesn't mean you have to luv sports and those things.. Let him be who he wants to be and maybe when he turns 13ish he'll start to like sports.
4. There's no point in trying to change your son to liking what YOU think he should like. He obviously enjoys literature and art and that's not something bad at all. You should be proud and accepting of the fact that he has developed a sense of identity in what he likes and dislikes. You really should just forget about how other kids are like and realise that your son is special. I'm not trying to persuade or evangelise my Christianity but I believe that God created people so special and unique, and you should really just love your son for who he is because God made him a special, one of a kind, unique child. Part of unconditional love is loving a person for who they are, and its important as a parent that you really communicate and instill that into your children. It would be awful if he grew up thinking that he wasn't what you wanted and wasn't good enough for you. Just love him without comparing him to other children because he can't be something he's not, and trying to make him something he's not will just all fall apart, and could really leave him with an identity crisis when he's older. Hope I helped.
5. He's not missing out on anything. You need to stop living vicariously through him and accept him for who he is...that's what a good parent does. You promote that you are christian but certainly aren't coming across as one.
6. He's not missing out on things he doesn't want to do or has rejected as being uninteresting to him. Love him for the unique and wonderful child he is, rather than an imaginary child you'd rather have. The one exception I'd make to this is that he should exercise, even if he doesn't like organized sports. But don't force him to watch football or play with cars--he won't start liking those things, just resent them (and you) for being forced on him. So try to make the most of the interests he does have--if he likes playing video games, or reading books, then advance his knowledge about those things; buy him good books; when he gets older, encourage him to write. So he can be the best person he IS, not the best person he ISN'T.
7. You could be talking about my 9 year old son! I'm not too worried but continue to encourage him in so-called boy activities without pushing him into anything he doesn't want to do. I try to have a friend over to play at least once a week and he joined the boyscouts so I know he can mix with other boys and does take part in outdoor activities. I think we'll be really proud later on when all that reading pays off!
8. And what is wrong with books? Or drawing? Not all boys like sports. You are just using that stereotype because you are homophobic. What you can do for your son is accepting him as the person he is. He isn't the one missing out...YOU are. You are missing out on getting to know the very intelligent prolific person that your son is. My oldest brother didn't like sports or "boys" activities either...he is now one of the most very highly paid very well respected, nationally awarded Pediatric Dentists in the U.S.
9. I'd suggest a couple things for your son. I'd suggest swimming lessons regardless of his interest level because it is very important to know how to swim from a safety standpoint. I'd maybe also have him get involved in a sports class such as gymnastics or basketball that is non-competitive, just so he gets enough exercise. I'd suggest community education or the local YMCA for non-competitive sports classes. I would suggest Awana programs at a local church. It involves memorizing scriptures, playing games, singing, etc. The kids earn badges to wear on a vest and have lots of fun. A lot of churches have that group. http://www.awana.org/about/default.aspx?id=23 He might enjoy taking drawing classes. I'd consider also chess and/or drama. I'm not a big fan of kids watching tv and don't know what total drama island is, but it really sounds too adult for a chld. I also don't know much about Pokemon or Digimon, but I'd look into it and see what I feel about it from a Christian perspective. A lot of boys don't like transformers etc. There are lots of talents your son has. I'd just try to develop those and try to find others that you are not aware of.
10. I see your son as being a fairly normal boy. My son does all the same things, although he's starting to develop more interests in competitive sports now that he's ready to turn 8. At 7 your son is already focusing on his interests. If he's really bright, try exposing him to some intellectual pursuits like a chess class, a computer animation class, or an art appreciation class. You'll find other kids more like him, and he will find companionship similar to that in an organized sport. He's not missing out on anything by avoiding the commercialized toys that appeal to the masses. For gifts I would just look to his interests - special trips to the bookstore, a young writer's workshop, a computer aided art program for the computer, etc.
11. Have you tried buying him building toys like Magnetix, Tinker Toys, Lego's etc. Or look at the Discovery Channels website they have tons of great learning toys, scientific kits etc. I would not try to change him he sounds like a wonderful child, accept him for who he is. I do not think he is missing out, missing out would be when he is no longer allowed to be who he is.
12. It sounds like he's incredibly right-brained. Do some quick internet research on the idea and see if that helps you come up with some creative ways to incorporate your idea of a boy and his idea of fun. If he's really bright and loves to read, I would suggest visiting a local comic book store and asking for some help in picking out a graphic novel that's appropriate for a little guy. You might also consider investing in some art supplies or even art lessons. If Halloween is a disappointment for you, ask him if he'd like to create a costume of his favorite book character. Don't try to make him fit into your idea of what he should be, but instead, try to find ways to help him expand his interests.
13. My suggestion would be to stop turning him into what you believe is stereotypically what boys should be or what boys should like. Whenever you stereotype or worse yet expect kids to behave sterotypically you will be sadly disappointed. I'm a teacher and I see this all the time. I have had several boy students who are incredibly intelligent and totally boys, they just don't like those cartoony character stuffs. For presents, why don't you ask him. I would purchase the kiddo: books, art supplies, experiences (trips to the movies or to plays), etc....Now, ask yourself this... is it your son missing out or is it you missing out on those things. If so, buy yourself those toys.
14. He seems pretty normal to me. Maybe you need to reexamine your idea of "normal". One of my kids was like that and he turned out okay. Married and got two kids. Each child has his personality. Take him to a psychologist if you are still worried. Good luck!