Baltrum

My wife has mental illness where she is too clingy and needy?

My wife is very demanding and needy. We've been married since December and I thought then she would be the perfect wife. She found out she was pregnant a month before our wedding and I was happy as I wanted another child with my ex wife. Since then she has become demading. Shortly after the wedding she began to fall asleep early in the evening and was always being sick. I used to tell her to go to bed, or go and stay with her mum so me and my son (whos 19) could play games, Just because she felt tired and sick there was no need to spoil my life. My son was due to go to his mums to live, but I dont want him to go. My son is my best friend. which upset my wife -p but shes my wife not my friend. She wanted us to move to a 3bed house but I wouldnt as my son is fed up with my wife and wants time alone with me, also my wife would be on the tennancy and could throw me out if she wanted and I'm not willing to lose my son over her. ] I arranged for her to go to her old house and i will visit her and the baby (though i need to be available to my son and don;t want him to feel left out). When my wife insisted she wanted to live with me i said i may look for a 3bed house - but now she says its too late and I should have done it when I was offered one and after what my son siad about her she doenst want to live with him anymore. I told her I was going on holiday with some mates when the baby is a month old - she got angry. When I realised how controlling she would be stopping me from doing what i want, I decided to book a holiday to the canary islands. She will be heavily pregnant at the time, but not due for a few weeks. I need to get away and am going alone. She told me she'd leave if I went - yet that means she doesnt want me. Other women put up with their husbands going on holiday alone, why is she so needy?

Public Comments

1. wow you are a horrible person let alone a horrible husband
2. I think you're the one with the mental illness. You don't sound as if you even like the woman.
3. She may be needy due to hormonal changes re: the pregnancy. But, I believe YOU are the problem. You give her every reason to be needy and controlling, by your attitude and wanting your son to be with over your wife. You need the Psychiatrist, not her. She is perfectly sane. You, my friend, need help in establishing and building a relationship with your wife, and not having your son take her place in your life and love.
4. This seriously has to be a joke. You are a joke.
5. you sound like a real piece of work~Dude your "son" is 19 how is he gonna feel left out ?? He should be living on his own with his own gf by now instead of playing "games" with his DADDY~ you sound very narcissistic to me~ 1- you wanted another child ? 2- you married the mother of the next child that's coming? 3-now YOU don't want her to spoil fun w/you & your grown son? 4-what kind of role model are you ???? Do you even care?? 5-she needs to stay @ her moms cause she feels "tired & sick" from the pregnancy of carrying YOUR child?? 6-you don't go away w/the "mates" while she is pregnant or right after the next child is born!!!!!! 7-spend some time with a psychiatrist & then see who is the NEEDY one♦
6. You sound like you are married to your son and your wife was supposed to be just there for the good times. That all got screwed up, huh? Now you have a wife who is going to have your baby and a son who you are clinging to, who should be up and out on his own. Hmmmm, what's in the middle of this mess? YOU! Better figure out what you're doing and where you're going because your 19 year old is going to be gone in a VERY short time and so might your wife!
7. Oh my God.... Your first duty is to your wife. When we marry, we traditionally promise "to forsake all others and cleave only to her". We promise to "love, honor and cherish" our partners. To me, you don't even seem married at all. You have no sense of obligation to her after you've gotten her pregnant and married her....you just expect her to be a bystander, a housekeeper and cook who works around YOUR life. She has no life of her own. Your grown son who is old enough to be on his own is placed before her. She feels like extra baggage...like a house servant who is just supposed to show up and do her job without expecting anything in return....not even pay! (Yet alone respect and affection!) Believe me, this was a mistake. You are better off parted and she is much better off without you in her life. Maybe she will find someone else and be able to have a decent life. Go on your holiday.....after all, you are only concerned with what YOU need....right? Her feelings are not important to you I wish HER all the best in life.
8. the only thing i hear is my son and i my son and i, where the heck is the wife? ur wife shud take same or more priority than ur wife...stop giving so much attention to ur son's needs and pay more attention to ur wife..
9. Oh my god, you've posted the same question into 3 or 4 different categories. Do you think that if you put enough quantity out there you'll get someone to validate your piss-poor performance as a husband and a man. Man up and take responsibility for your wife and unborn child. A wife is supposed to live with her husband. If your son feels "left out" because you need to take care of your wife, and he can't understand why you need to give them your attention right now, then he is an ever sorrier excuse for a man than you are. Teach him to be a man and take responsibility for yourself.
10. wow you are so so selfish! Do you ever think about anyone other than yourself!? Your wife was ill, so you claim thats her "ruining your life". wow. You dont deserve her. Your wife had every entitlement to be annoyed when you stated you wanted to go on a holiday. Your wife will be heavily pregnant. That just says it all!! She needs you there! How could you even think of leaving her when shes like that? I cant get over how selfish you are. Try thinking of other people instead of yourself. Your the one with the psychiatric problem. Not your poor wife!