Baltrum

How rude do you find last minute cancellations from friends?

For example, say two friends have shopping and lunch plans for a Saturday. Friend A is known to be spontanious and friend B planned. Spontanious friend cancels at the last minute. Friend B expresses disappointment, and asks "why?". Friend B refuses an explaination. She just says she didn't think the plans were definate, and is excitedly going with "someone else". B thinks it's rude that A canceled for what seems simply a "better offer". Would you find this rude?

Public Comments

1. know the situation well and you have to live with it or find friends who plan everything like you do.
2. Yeah it sure is rude. I've been there and it really pissed me off. Tell your friend and risk a fight or learn to live with it.
3. yeah it is rude. or friend A should at least have let friend B from the beginning that she might or might not be able to go. nothing wrong with spontaneousness but a date is a date and only good reason is if they cant make it. friend A isnt a real friend for ditching friend B
4. Just roll with it and keep in mind that they "may not be able to make it" when you have access to a really cool event. Explain that they should be available more often and go to the Super Bowl...er something!
5. If a friend canceled PLANS to do something else, that is VERY rude. Express your feelings. Once they have heard your side, they should be more careful and understand that it hurts your feelings. If they continue to do it, they arent your friend and you should stop making plans with them. If you care about them a lot, you can tell them up front "Look, I am your friend and I want to hang out with you but I'm tired of making plans that you keep breaking, so from now on if you want to do something with me, YOU make plans ok" and she'll get it.
6. I think in that situation it's very rude, I've (had) friends like this before. It just got to the point that whenever we would plan something, I wouldn't trust that person to follow through. It hurts when someone "trades up" on you, makes you feel like they just made plans with you as a fall back and they were just waiting for something better to come along. My suggestion is to either realize that this person has a very high chance of being a flake all the time, or find someone else to be friends with.
7. It is very rude of "friend" B to cancel at the last minute, this shows a distinct lack of respect for friend A. I would tell friend B that in the future to consider ALL plans to be definate and if a "better offer" comes along to suck it up and stick with the original plan or let the friendship go because a second time (for invalid reasons) will not be tollerated/acceptable.
8. Maybe not rude, but a bit inconsiderate
9. It is the very definition of rude.